Extending your comfort zone
Don't create barriers to growth
By Jim LaJoie
One simple test of whether you are an introvert or extrovert is asking yourself if you feel recharged and energized when around other people. If you are, then you are an extrovert.
Are you drained after spending time with a group of people and only feel energized after spending some time alone? You are an introvert if that describes you.
I am, without question, an introvert. I am not socially awkward; I can fit into most social settings, even if a bit reluctantly. My time alone, or with just my wife sitting quietly reading or watching television, is important to me, especially after a long day at work. At work, the nature of my job forces me to be an extrovert at many points in the day. I often come home exhausted, not from physical exertion – I spend much of my day behind a desk – but from having to deal with so many people during a given day.
In addition to being an introvert, as I have gotten older, I tend to fall into comfortable routines, even at the risk of not being able to have new experiences. I struggle with this: my comfort zone fighting my desire to continue to grow as a person, which requires new experiences.
Recently my wife suggested attending a dinner thrown by a group in our development. It was on a Monday night, the beginning of my work week. My gut reaction was to instantly tell her I didn’t want to go. I realized, though, that this was something my wife, far more extroverted than me, wanted to do. I also realized that, despite my hesitancy, it was something I should do. I begrudgingly agreed to go, convinced I would hate it. There were no inherent reasons why I wouldn’t enjoy the dinner, just my inner voice saying, “let’s just stay within our quiet, safe comfort zone.”
I went, I ate, I enjoyed myself. We met some very nice people, people we may socialize with in the future. If I had listened to my inner voice, the one urging me to stay comfortably within my comfort zone, I would never have gone, met some nice people, and maybe deprived myself of some future positive moments.
My inner voice is not inherently wrong for urging me to stay within my comfort zone. I need to have quiet moments to feel whole. There are times when I really would not be best served by going to an event, for whatever reason. But that inner voice can be self-limiting, confining, keeping me isolated from the world. It is at those moments I must gently tell my inner voice that I am going to ignore it and have new experiences, even if those experiences are somewhat intimidating initially.
It is only from pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone that you can continue to grow as a person, to not let the world pass you by. Time goes by so quickly. You are young one moment, not so much the next. Don’t look back with regrets. Don’t let yourself be imprisoned by your comfort zone, step outside of it from time to time and see what life brings.
About the author: Jim LaJoie was born and raised in Massachusetts but fled the harsh winters by relocating to North Carolina. He has lived more decades than he cares to admit.
Loved it Jim!I would never think you were an introvert. It is so true to put yourself out there to grow as a person. It is so easy to just stay in our comfort zone!